Batman: Inquire Within
by LiveToCreateCreateToLive
Summary: "What happens when a very powerful evil is pushed too far?" "What does the Batman fear the most?" You're about to find out.
1. And So It Begins

"Dick, please"

Did he just plead to me? Jesus, he has to be desperate.

"Alright fine, fine."

"Thank you"

I hung up and put the phone back down. Where'd he get this number anyways? Wait, what am I saying? This is Bruce we're talking about.

Yes, you heard correctly, I said Bruce, as in Bruce Wayne, as in the billionaire playboy by day, masked vigilante by night Bruce Wayne. And he just asked ME for help. Me, of all people.

I haven't even been out of the Manor a month, and he's calling me up.

"What's wrong honey?"

I look back at my girlfriend, Rose Wilson. She used to be my arch nemesis, but I got her to turn over a new leaf and, now she fights at my side.

She has just gotten out of the shower and is drying off. The tiny water droplets falling off her long, wet hair, and as she stands in front of me, naked, I have to remind myself that there's an emergency.

"God you're beautiful"

"Thank you Dick, I'm glad you noticed," she said teasingly, "Hey, tonight I kind of wanted you to skip patrol, it's been a long time, and I'm feeling a little… lonely"

After I finish gazing at the amazing body that walks through the bedroom door, I look out the window to find the bat signal, the beacon of hope to all those who live in Gotham, lighting up the night sky. He can handle himself for a few minutes, I mean, he's Batman for Christ's sake.

But of course, as soon as I open the bedroom door, the phone rings.

"I'm so sorry baby, tomorrow night, I swear"

I ran out of the room, but not before taking a look at the natural beauty of my girlfriend.

_Bruce!_, I think to myself, _why did it have to be tonight of all nights?_

I then suited up, and prepared for battle.

Alright, Escrima Sticks?

Check.

Boots?

Check.

Gauntlets?

Check.

Wing-Dings?

Check.

Mask?

Obviously… oh wait!

Ugh, as much as I like going solo, I sure wish I still had someone like Alfred around.

I hopped in the car, and sped off.

_What could he possibly need me for?_, I thought to myself as I neared the secret entrance.

_Now where could he be?_, I thought.

"Batman?" I shouted into the bat cave

"Only Yooou…" sang a creepy, almost familiar voice

"Batman?" I said a little more quietly

"Can make the darkness briiight" sang the voice again.

Then, out of the darkness of the cave limped a small shape, a tall, slender, freakish looking man with a huge smile on his face.

"Joker."


	2. Here We Go Again

"Joker."

"Hey! You remember me!" he yelled, "I'm so… touched"

And then he laughed. That terrible, terrible laugh. It runs chills down your spine, and gives even the most courageous a small shiver.

"What do you want, Joker?" I tried to keep my voice as steady as possible.

"Oh, haven't we gone over this already?" he said with dramatized boredom, "I've already told you! I want this world to see things the way I do: life is a joke, and it's meant to be lived with a big SMILE on your face!"

After stepping into the light, he traced the contours of his smile with his fingers.

Was it just me? Or did Joker look really beat up? His usually white skin looked even paler, his bright red lips and neon green hair losing color, and becoming a duller shade of what once was there. Like a spirit who is not able to let go of his body, but being trapped within by fear or hate for what lied ahead.

All of a sudden, Harley Quinn walked out of the pitch black as well. "Well, well, well, look who it is! The boy blunder himself, come back for more, little man?"

I remember the first time I had fought her, she beat me to a pulp. That crazy bitch always has something up her sleeve.

"I'm only gonna ask one more time!" I yelled, my voice shaky, "WHERE IS HE?"

My yell echoed off the walls of the cave, and you could hear startled bats fly away into the distance.

"No need to shout, Robin! No one is gonna hear you anyway!" Joker screamed, and let out a long horrific giggle afterwards.

"The name isn't Robin, it's Nightwing." I said confidently.

"Oh, how sweet, gone solo have we?" Harley said.

All of a sudden, I look down at my arm, and realized that I'm covered in red dots. Then, as I look up to see where they are coming from, the lights come on, and all around me are Joker's henchman, all with sniper rifles.

"There's no one to help you now little boy," said Joker menacingly.

Then, my wrist pops a Wing-Ding from out of my sleeve compartment and into my hand.

Then I speak, "Two things. One, I am far from a little boy. And two, you're not the only one with something up your sleeve."


	3. New Discoveries

"And two, you're not the only one with something up your sleeve."

Everything happened almost like it was practiced beforehand. At the same time, that I heard a gunshot in the balcony above, I let lose the Wing-Ding I had in my hand and let it fly directly for the Joker and Harley. After Harley leaped out of the way, and Joker dodged it, I look up to see Rose up on the balcony, killing all the snipers with her bare hands.

"Damn, she's hot"

With blood raining from the balcony, I turned to face his enemies, only to see Joker rushing up a ladder, and out into,

"The Armory!"

• • •

"Come on Harley," Joker said as he was behind her on the ladder leading up to the Batwing, "we haven't got much time!"

"You're right!"

CLANG

My Wing-Ding just misses Joker's head, lodging itself into the rail of the ladder next to his face, and he jumps in fear, falling off the ladder. Harley obviously noticed her "Mistah J" helpless on the floor, so she jumps off too, but when she lands, she doesn't fall, but has her mallet in hand, with a prepped bazooka on her back.

_Where the hell does she keep all this shit?_ I thought to myself.

"I guess its time for a rematch," I said, now focused for the battle to come

"BATTER UP!" Harley yelled

She attacks first, swinging her mallet at my head.

I perform a perfect backhand spring over her, and try to grab the mallet the moment I land. It works but as soon as I grab hold, she rushes me into the wall, with her mallet pushing me against it. I then jab my handle into her stomach, but she curves her back so as to avoid it, and swings the mallet, with me still holding on.

I let go, and flip through the air, firing off a couple of darts as I go. I land one in her leg, and she doubles over in pain.

"Oh fuck this!" She screams angrily

She takes the bazooka off her back, and aims directly for me. Thinking on my toes, I leap over Joker, and grab him just as he is getting up. I put him in front of me and see Harley, trying to come up with a game plan, the wheels in her head turning at a slow pace I would imagine.

"Stop thinking so much, before you hurt yourself!" I said

"Ha, Ha, very funny!" she said sarcastically

"If you pull that trigger, then we all get blown to shit!" I said with confidence, "And you wouldn't want to kill the father of your children!"

"Wha… How did you…" she looked absolutely dumbfounded

"You do realize what happens to your belly when you're pregnant, and since there's no residue of food or crumbs any where near you, and I highly doubt you gained 10 pounds from the crackers Joker throws at you when he's bored…" I shouted

"How dare you!" she said, unsure of what to do

_Sheesh, Joker feels like a ragdoll in my hand right now!_ I think to myself.

All of a sudden a voice comes out of the intercom speakers:

"Hello lady and gentleman, I hope that you are having a good time because it's about to get even better! You might even call it… a BLAST!"


End file.
